Monday, February 14, 2011

My Addict Valentine....

Ryan called me last night.

He told me he is at a motel down my street and he needs to see me for closure.

I told him it was a BAD idea. After all, yesterday I had a GREAT day.

Had lunch with a best friend, a drink, and the Los Angeles sun shined and the weather was amazing.

Seeing him would only make my recovery more hard.

However, against my wishes, he came.

He went through my neighbors gate and tapped on my bedroom window.

Scared I got up and hid, but then, I saw who it was...


He explained how he needed to see me and he was gonna leave a rose in my mailbox but was unsure if my mom would get it. I asked him where his car is.

STORY: The same girl Sonia who called him "Ricky" and wanted to party with "Tina" stole it. I asked why she would do such a thing...He said, "Because I wouldn't sleep with her. We were messing around chillin outside and she was sitting in my car while I stood outside. She then started to drive off and told me, 'Give me all the money in your wallet or I steal your car.' She stole it because I didnt want to sleep with her."

-Blank stare-

Is this SERIOUS...Because honestly, lets just be HONEST...that is an ADDICT STORY. So colorful and so interesting.

He said he still loves me and he is CLEAN.

Me thinking, "You stayed at someones house who does Meth and you are clean? Right-------------"

So I sit here...ONCE AGAIN second questioning myself. "Is he clean?"

My gut says "No"
His face looked as if he has been sweating and his eyes were so glossy.

He told me he now has a cig habit and just wanted me to know he wishes me a Happy Valentine's Day.

He left and so after I woke my mom up to see if she can get the neighbor to lock the gate.

What CLEAN SOBER person does that in the middle of the night??

Breaks into someone's yard and taps on someones window all for closure?


Krazy Azz Malika said...

i'm proud of you, beautiful. i know that telling him not to come was a difficult thing to say. it sucks that he came by anyway, but i'm sure the picture of him only let you confirm your suspicions. unfortunately he'll probably come back, but once he knows that he can't get shelter and money from you (or anyone else) he'll be forced to deal with his own demons.

Stephie J said...

fucking psycho!!!!!! next time this happens call the police!!